It is so difficult to talk about emotional abuse because it is so much bigger than the sum of its parts. The everyday instances, when isolated, seem so insignificant and commonplace that you feel it’s not worth mentioning at all. When you do try to articulate it, it sounds so juvenile, and others will not hesitate to point this out to you.
But within the context of somebody with power over you, somebody you trust using these small moments as tools to strategically wear you down to absolutely nothing, it is suffocating. It overwhelms you and you find you cannot see the forest for the trees and when you try to fight back, try to tell them exactly what they are, the only thing you can do is cite isolated incidents. And they will laugh in your face. And you fear everyone else will, too.
This is why it takes years before you can speak up at all, years before you realize what it all added up to and how it has broken you.
Please listen to victims of abuse. Listen hard. And read between the lines.
as 2014 winds down and we celebrate with end of the year festivities, please think of rise and eunbi.
please think of the time and energy they poured into their careers in an industry that did not pause for even a second when they died. think of sojung, ashley, and zuny, but not in the context of “will ladies code ever come back?” just as people who are hurting need love and support. think of their families who are missing and aching for them right now. please spare a thought for these two who left us far too soon, and cannot be here with to celebrate the end of 2014 with everyone else.
rise and eunbi, i love you, we all love you, and you’re always in our hearts.
still super torn on what to do with this blog so i’m doing some housekeeping. i did a mass unfollow bust it was mostly inactive blogs/people i dont talk to one-on-one (sorry), and data blogs bc i’m not in to looking at data of my faves so much anymore.
as always, if you would like to follow the blog that i update pretty regularly (it’s mostly just jinyoung and the occasional text post) let me know? if we have been mutuals for a while/talk at all/you don’t know me irl.
i think i’m in a weird place of “my web presence is dying as i get older but i want to maintain contact with people so deleting my tumblr appears out of the question” which is why i keep going back and forth with this blog. hmm.
BREAKING NEWS (12/3/14): They choked a man to death on video, and they still were cleared. No justice, no peace. #staywoke #farfromover
how are there no charges against an officer who used an illicit chokehold that was prohibited for its killing potential on a man in clear view, with full visual and audio evidence. how is there no indictment. not even negligent manslaughter.
what is it going to take, america. what is it going to take. guilty verdict or not. when do the victims get a simple fucking trial.
the semester is almost over. i’ve had a lot of time to cool down and get things down and attempt to find myself in a better place than i was before. it’s really weird that this blog was just like inherently attached to so much shit that was making me feel bad. but in a lot of ways i’m feeling better now and i don’t want to have to feel like i’m being pushed out of my space anymore. hmm.
